A Year Ago...

One year ago this morning, I woke in a hotel room in Circleville.  My in-laws just next door (with half my kids).  We had said our final goodbye's to Ryan Nathan...yet there was so much more to be said!  The grieving process is one I do not claim to understand.  I am learning that while a process, it is different for everyone and yet so similar.  The emotions of the past 12 months are long and difficult.  To loose someone so young, so early.  There was so much more to say.  We know he had more to say.  As we communicated for the last time in a hospital room just hours before he was put on hospice care and sent home - he wanted to talk.  He wanted to communicate and yet everything was cut short.

Ryan was not only an amazing man.  He was a loving uncle.  Always a smile for his niece and nephews!  He was a devoted daddy, He loved and was so proud of his four girls.  He was a passionate husband - he loved Holly unconditionally.  He was a son, one of only 2, the youngest, the baby of the family.  He was a brother - full of competition and admiration for his big brother!

He was a nephew, a grandson, a cousin, a singer, a friend, hard worker, a learner, a talented man, a craftsman, there are so many words that could describe Ryan.  Most importantly Ryan was a lover and follower of Jesus Christ!  He believed very strongly and he would tell anyone about his relationship with Jesus.  He desired for everyone to know Jesus and have a personal relationship with Jesus!  He had dreams to build the kingdom!

Now as we are a full year from saying our last good-byes - the grieving continues.   The pain..the loss  a life that was  taken way too early.  A life that had so much more to live and give.  It's hard to swallow, yet I know if Ryan were here today he would say - Love Jesus, Live each day for Jesus!  He lived it - He desired it for his children, his family, his friends, everyone he met! 

We are not guaranteed our next breath in this life.  Are you living each moment, each breath for Jesus or are you just living and hoping to get that all sorted out in the end? 

We continue to grieve.  We continue to go through the gamete of emotions!  And we continue to trust in the only One who knows our pain and sorrow - JESUS!